Don't get the social media blues

I'm a big advocate of social media (have I shocked you with that sentence?). I love it so much I made it part of my business! I'm always a little put-off when someone says they are not on at least one social media site. I cried tears of joy when a good friend finally set up her Facebook account over the weekend. In a world of smart phones and tablets, it truly is a faster way to stay connected than even making a phone call nowadays.

Last week yet another study about social media and emotional health surfaced. I always enjoy reading these studies. Naturally, I read every study with my cool hipster-skeptic glasses on. You always need to know where a study comes from, how many were involved, what questions were asked, etc, etc. Studies are good to get a very basic idea of how people are thinking. This latest study says that reading Facebook updates can make you depressed and envious. You know, because according to Facebook everyone has absolutely perfect, happy lives. Why don't you?

(Never mind just a couple of weeks ago a study emerged stating that you feel less lonely when you post to Facebook.) Sorry- one study at a time, Dani!

From the article: "Witnessing friends' vacations, love lives and work successes on Facebook can cause envy and trigger feelings of misery and loneliness, according to German researchers."

"The researchers found that one in three people felt worse after visiting the site and more dissatisfied with their lives, while people who browsed without contributing were affected the most."

What is everyone envious of? Apparently how everyone is out having a good time, has an awesome family, travels, gets more "likes" and posts on their wall on birthdays, and looks so much more amazing than they do. And you? You are just sitting at home reading their updates, loser.

Seriously.

After some more contemplation, I definitely could see in myself where this has been true. I catch myself falling victim to the green monster at times when scrolling the news feed. It happens even to the most rational of people (I would like to think I am a fairly rational person, at least 70% of the time). It's a completely normal reaction, when all you see is the good.  I'll type that again- all you see is the good. No one is going to post that they have just had another fight with their significant other, snap a picture of their angry face and put it on Instagram (and if you do, please stop). You're looking at the awesome photo of the family having the best vacation ever at Disneyland. What you didn't see is that it took 10 minutes of wrangling to get that shot, and then immediately after the youngest child threw up on a sibling.

This is the key to conquering the social media blues. People are going to post mostly the good things that happen, then tell (and show) you how amazing it is. The study also states people post even MORE happy statuses, in an effort to make their lives seem more amazing than they really are! It turns into a subconscious competition of status updates. Humans are strange beings.

Keep in mind that the lives you are reading about are not 100% perfect 100% of the time. You are only getting a small percentage of a person's life via Facebook updates. Status updates are more like status brags. You are only seeing what that person wants you to see. If you still feel that envy, try and figure out why. Do you see your friends getting together all the time, and you fume about why they are not including you? Try giving them a call and make your own plans with them. Maybe your envy over someone's vacation photos is just the universe telling you it's time to plan your own getaway.

Be happy, and be smart about social media. If you are smart about social media on the personal side, it will ensure that you are smart about social media on the business side.

Thanks for reading! If you feel so inclined, you can follow my daily ramblings on Twitter, and get all sorts of information from my Facebook Page! See you around the interwebs! 

Be smart about Yelp

As I was making my social media rounds a couple of days ago, I came across an interesting post in the Phoenix New Times' Chow Bella section. They asked several valley restaurant owners what they think of Yelp Reviews. I wasn't surprised to find that most of the chefs asked were either indifferent or didn't like them. I get it. No one likes to have their work criticized, and chefs are in their own league. I think food reviews are even more difficult, because for some reason people really take their food seriously. It's not just about the food either- dining out is an experience, and the one place where everyone wants to be catered to exclusively. Admit it- you could care less if it's 7pm on a Saturday night and the restaurant is packed. That server should behave and treat you like there is one server per table. You finished your salad 5 minutes ago, so your meal should have been on the table 3 minutes ago!

Thus where the Yelp world gets sticky. Yelp is another social interaction site. You check-in to show your circle of followers where you are and what you're doing. You friend people (and they you) for the same reason. On their mobile app you can now "like" and "comment" on your friend's check-ins. You write your reviews, and people can click and find it useful, cool, or funny. I look at Yelp as more of a mini-blogging site for reviews. I also use Yelp rather than Foursquare, because Yelp let's you leave reviews and not just tips about a place.

I use Yelp all the time to find places, as well as find out about a company or restaurant before deciding to try something out. The problem is, you can't simply read the average of stars and make a snap decision. You actually need to read through the reviews. I think this one of the reasons some chefs do not take Yelp seriously. It's way too easy to leave a one-star review because you only had 4 ice cubes in your drink instead of 5. Or because you love a burger with extra cheese and dripping in grease, you give that place 5 stars. When I visited New York a couple of years ago, I checked in at the Staten Island Ferry. When I looked over the reviews, one of them was 1-star, and all it said was "I hate Staten Island." Okie dokie. There is also a fair share of "padding" that can happen. Restaurants have been in trouble for having their employees leave amazing reviews. Owners have also gone a little crazy on the site too when they see a review they don't agree with.

So take 5 minutes (or less) and read through reviews before you decide on going somewhere. Obviously if a vegetarian doesn't like a restaurant because there aren't enough choices for them, and give a place 2 stars, I (as a carnivore) might still check it out. If several reviews talk about how messy the place is and the smell of garbage in the air, well I might avoid it.

Chefs and other business-owners, don't ignore Yelp. Sure, it's a hodge-podge of people and when you combine a free site with humans who can hide behind a user name, you will get idiots here and there. But some of us actually take our reviewing seriously, and want to either promote the hell out of you, or help make you better if there is something wrong. Interact with us too- we're more likely to come back and try you again if you tell us you're improving or changing what could be a problem.

With great power comes great responsibility, and Yelp can be a pretty powerful social media tool.  Not only do you have to be smart about writing your reviews, you have to be smart about reading them too.

You never know what will happen...

Why, it's Josh Temple of House Crashers!
Why is he at our TechPhx meeting?

Today began our 2013 TechPhx season! We had a lovely kickoff brunch at Paradise Bakery in Tempe Marketplace, and had a good group of interested (and interesting!) people turn out. This year I am co-leading the (un) conference with the marvelous Perri Collins, and I couldn't be happier. Her spunk and go-get'em attitude will not only help keep ME on track, but we always have a great time together too! I was also very happy to see many old and new faces turn up. It's going to be an exciting year of planning! Follow the TechPhx Facebook and Twitter pages to keep up on all the latest happenings. There is also plenty of opportunity to get involved! Meetings will be every third Saturday of the month from here on out.

We ended up outside by the fire pit for the majority of the meeting- it was just too busy inside! There's a big sign of commitment- braving this unusual cold weather! Afterwards a few of us were still standing outside chatting, and a camera crew walked by. Then they were striking up conversation. Turns out the crew of the DIY series "House Crashers" is in Tempe looking for a lucky home to crash and redecorate. He was super nice, and we got to plug TechPhx while the cameras were rolling! Of course, who knows if any of that makes it into the final cut, but it never hurts!

It was a fun and crazy morning. Sometimes the unexpected is a good thing, and now some of us have a nice memory from the morning. You never know what the day will bring!